Therapy
by Phantom Pendragon
Summary: A series of one shots and drabbles based around when Ash was in the hospital in Mass Effect 3. They will range from humerous to thoughtful to tear-jerker drama. Focuses on Ashley/M!Shepherd romance and Ashley/Thane friendship. Will also feature other characters.


**A series of one shots and drabbles based around Ashley's time in the hospital in Mass Effect 3. **

"Now, raise your arms and breath deep," the instructor said pleasantly.

Ashly Williams obeyed, but it hurt. Sharp pain ran through her side and she stifled a gasp, shaking from the simple task of raising her arms above her head. She felt so weak, so cursedly weak.

She hated therapy.

She had just woken up a few days ago. It had been hard to remember at first what had happened, but it came back to her. She remembered chasing after the robot that was impersonating a doctor, how James had stopped its escape by crashing the shuttle into it's transport. She remembered the horrible screeching of metal as the machine emerged from the flaming wreckage like something out of a nightmare. It had grabbed her by the throat, choking the life from her.

She remembered Shepherd's look of pure terror, the only time she had ever seen him show fear. She remembered being slammed against the smoldering hull of the transport, her ribs cracking, head exploding in pain and lungs burning for air.

Time seemed to slow down as she was dropped. She saw John running forward, firing his gun. When the machine reached him, he gutted it with his omni-blade, a primal roar escaping his throat. Then she remembered only blackness before waking up in a hospital bed on the citadel.

"Well done," the instructed said. "I think that is enough for today. We will resume tomorrow." The small class of patients around her broke up, most limping back to their beds. A few of the better ones took a seat in the garden area, looking out over the city. Ash was not one of the better ones, but she took a seat anyway. She needed to clear her head and think, and a hospital bed is a bad place to do that.

Her mind spun in confusion. She had yet to deal with the fact that the reapers had come, and that they had hit earth. The image of a burning city and dead corpses was forever burned into her mind. She shuddered, trying not to think about it.

On top of that she had another issue, one incredibly small and pointless, yet much more pressing than the reapers. The issue of John Shepherd and her love life.

She didn't know what to think of John, or herself now. She had avoided him because of his ties to Cerberus, unable to see past her hatred for the organization. Now she regretted it, but she couldn't change the past. He had been patient with her, answering her questions as best he could. What bothered her was the last thing she said to him was a word of doubt, mistrust and... Contempt. Not for him directly, but his past. Still, her doubt must have hurt, even if his face never showed it.

That stupid face of his, always strong, giving a needed smile or cracking a joke when spirits were down. How that face drove her insane. How did he remain so calm when everything was falling apart?

She looked up to see someone staring at her. It was a Drell, a green skinned, reptilian alien that never seemed to blink. She recognized him as a member of her therapy group. She didn't know much about the Drell species, other than they had some sort of attachment to the Hanar. This one seemed to be looking at her intently, as if studying her.

She returned his curious look, confused. He seemed to take this as a sign, as he got up and walked over to her.

"Miss Williams?" he asked, his voice flat. Not emotionless or cold, simply flat.

"Yeah, that's me," Ashly answered. "Do we know each other?"

"Not directly, but we have a mutual friend," the Drell explained. "Commander Shepherd. May I?" He asked, gesturing to the chair across from her.

"Uh, sure," Ashley said, a bit flustered. "How do you know Joh-, I mean, the commander?"

"I traveled with him," the Drell explained. "I helped him fight the collectors. My name is Thane, Thane Krios."

It rang a bell somewhere, but Ashley wasn't sure where.

"Your familiar," she said, "but I can't say I remember you. Sorry."

"No apology needed," Thane said. "I understand you and the Commander had little contact during his house arrest, and with... Recent events, you have not had much time to talk. Seeing as I was here as well, I offered to keep an eye on you, make sure you were doing well."

"Protect me, you mean," Ashly corrected. She knew how Shepherd thought.

Thane simply nodded. "If needed," he said. "In any event, it helps ease Shepherds mind."

Ashley smiled. He might have to go save the galaxy again, but he made sure she was looked after. That was John.

"How is Shepherd?" She asked. "I mean, about..." she didn't finish the sentence. Thane knew where she was going though.

"In pain, I believe," Thane said. "Though not physical pain. He is a man who has just watched his home burn and his closest friend attacked and hurt. He wishes he could stay, but-"

"But the universe needs Commander Shepherd," Ashley finished. "I understand. It's not fair to him though."

"How so?" the Drell asked.

Ashley had to take a minute to find her response. "He has sacrificed everything for the galaxy, twice even. Yet the moment there is trouble, they put him on the tip of the spear and throw him at the enemy. Shouldn't he get some respect at least? They mock him, insult him and then expect him to fight for them. It's- it's-" she had to stop, due to the pain in her side. She had started speaking softly, but her voice had rose as she had gotten angrier. She was surprised at her defense of him, considering her confusion regarding Shepherd at the moment.

"It's sick," she finished, quietly. She shook her head, "sorry," she said, "I shouldn't have exploded like that."

"I have been told humans need to get their emotions out now and again in such an outburst," Thane said. "I see no reason for shame."

Ashely looked at him, he was certainly an odd soul. "Thanks," she said with a smile. "I just wonder why he keeps going back to the council, after all they put him through."

"Perhaps because no one else will," Thane suggested. "Shepherd is a extraordinary man, a wise man. I believe he knows that someone must take the mantel, so he was taken it upon himself. It is a great burden, but it is one he bares willingly. It is simply who he is."

Ashly had no answer for this. The Drell stood up.

"I should go," he said. "Perhaps we shall speak later? Of less dire matters?"

"Yes, I'd like that," Ashley said. "Will you be with the therapy group tomorrow? "

Thane nodded. "I shall see you then, Miss Williams."

He walked away, leaving Ashley alone with her thoughts. She looked out the window at the citadel. She had come no closer to a decision about Shepherd, though what Thane had said would rattle around in her mind for a long time.

"An extraordinary man," she said aloud. "He is that, whatever else he may be."

A doctor came over and told her she needed to rest. She allowed him to help her to her bed and laid down, closing her eyes and trying to rest. She had plenty to think about, and was looking forward to talking with Thane tomorrow. Perhaps he could help give her troubled mind some answers about Shepherd.

Perhaps she wouldn't mind therapy so much after all.


End file.
